


Bruises and Drawings

by RobinPlaysTrumpet15



Series: Drawings from Soulmates [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, M/M, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2016-12-20
Packaged: 2018-09-10 17:30:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8926006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RobinPlaysTrumpet15/pseuds/RobinPlaysTrumpet15
Summary: Sirius Black had cuts and bruises and drawings showing up all over his body for years. This happened once every month from the time he was five. Remus Lupin just happened to be the source of these hurts and pictures.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I wanted to try a soulmate AU, and I absolutely love wolfstar. I hope you like this and let me know what you think!

Sirius Black had cuts and bruises and drawings showing up all over his body for years. When Sirius was five, red lines appeared over his stomach and face with no warning. Once a month, new lines and bruises would show up and fade within a week. As he got older, drawings started. Thick bold lines, thin fragile ones too, weaving together and forming pictures. Some of these pictures appeared where the worst bruises and red, angry lines had been before.

Sirius wanted to draw back. His soulmate was hurting somewhere, he was sure. And he just wanted them to know that he cared. That they wouldn’t be alone for long. But he couldn’t.

It was a rule. Sirius’ mother and father didn’t want him coloring on himself and staining his clothes. But sometimes, in the dead of night, he would sneak a quill and ink bottle out of his father’s desk and take them back to his room. Sirius would sit in the dark for hours, candlelight shining dimly around his room as he worked so hard on pictures for his soulmate. He’d draw flowers or wands with spells coming out of them or stick figures saying they loved each other. (Sirius wasn’t good at drawing people. Inanimate objects were fine though.)

Sometimes he would get a response. Other times, the drawing would just wash off of his arm or leg without so much as even a smiley face in return. But Sirius felt better.

As he got older, Sirius learned to hide the bruises and drawings under clothes, no longer showing his parents the markings anymore. He wanted them to be just for him. Besides, sometimes he couldn’t even tell which bruises were his or just appeared from his soulmate. As he got older, the drawings came less and less until all there was were the monthly wounds that faded faster than Sirius had time to really contemplate them.

By the time he was ready to leave for Hogwarts, Sirius had all but convinced himself that all the marks just came from his own stupid actions and his parents wrathful anger. His drawings probably never showed up on anyone and he spent a lot of time working for nothing. All the drawings and responses from when he was little were either his own work or his imagination.

“Sirius, it’s hot out. How are you wearing long sleeves?” James demanded, sprawled out in the grass. He and Sirius had been left on their own for the day, Remus having opted to stay in the common room and tutor Peter in potions.

“I just am, James.” Sirius responded, leaning against the tree they sat under. He was used to diverting James’ attention by now.

“You always say that. But really, Siri, aren’t you warm at all?”

Sirius shrugged. He had come not to mind a little extra heat, but today was especially hot. He would have loved to roll up his sleeves, unbutton his shirt a few inches, and loosen his tie. But he couldn’t. The bruises and red lines had come back a few days ago, and by now, he was sure they couldn’t have come from his parents. After all, he hadn’t seen them since September and it was nearly June now. He thought maybe he’d been doing things in his sleep, but that would be a lot to try and explain to his mates.

“Oh come on, Sirius. You’re going to burn up in all those clothes!” James was up and pouncing on him now, reaching for Sirius’ sleeves. Before the silver eyed boy could even do anything, James had pushed up his sleeves and pulled at his tie, Sirius’ black and blue skin glaring out from under his clothes. James sat still, stunned.

“Sirius… what did you do?” A look of horror settled over James’ features, his hazel eyes widening in shock behind the lenses of his glasses.

“I didn’t do anything, James.” Sirius defended, not even bothering to pull his sleeves back down.

“What do you mean, you didn’t do anything?! There are bruises all over you!” James cried out, jumping to his feet. He grabbed his bag from the grass and headed quickly towards the castle.

“James! Where are you going?!” Sirius called after him, following as quickly has he could. His friend didn’t respond, just broke into a run, forcing Sirius to run after him.

The two nearly barrelled into Professor Slughorn as they raced through the open doors.

“Woah, watch out you two- Sirius!” Slughorn grabbed onto Sirius’ shoulders, stopping the black haired 11 year old in his tracks. “Goodness, what happened to you, lad?”

“Nothing, professor. But I have to-” Sirius tried sidestepping the teacher, attempting to follow James, who was all the way up the marble staircase by now.

“No, no, no. I don’t want to hear that nonsense. Come with me.” Slughorn was steering Sirius away.

“But professor!”

“You need to see Madam Pomfrey, son.”

*

James kept running, regardless that he knew Sirius wasn’t chasing him anymore. He had to get up to the tower and talk to Remus about what he’d seen on Sirius, maybe figure out what their friend had done and why he would lie about it.

“Remus!” James cried, tumbling in through the portrait hole. “Remus, come with me!”

James grabbed the tawny haired boy’s arm, nearly dragging him away from his study session with Peter and up the steps to their room. Once inside, he closed the door behind them and locked it.

“What, James?” Remus asked, a scowl on his face.

“Sirius is hurt!”

“What? What do you mean ‘hurt’?”

“I mean he’s covered in these awful bruises and red marks! They’re all over his arms, and maybe elsewhere too.” James exclaimed. Remus could see a manic panic deep in the hazel eyes of his friend. Whatever had him spooked was really bad. “He says he didn’t do anything, but Remus, that can’t be true!”

“And why not?”

“Because the only way those marks couldn’t be his were if they were his soulmate’s.”

Remus nearly choked. James was right. He’d forgotten about that. Subconsciously, he rubbed at his own clothed arms, feeling the ache of his bruises and sting of bandaged scratches there. His own soulmate was covered in these too, he knew. They used to draw to him after full moons.

“Where is he now?”

“Professor Slughorn caught him just as we came inside. He probably dragged Sirius off to the hospital wing.” James said.

Remus grabbed James’ wrist and turned, tugging the other boy out of the dormitory with him. He was going to get to the bottom of this. He hoped Sirius wasn’t really in any danger.

*

“I can’t see a thing wrong with him.” Madam Pomfrey said as she was checking Sirius over. He was sitting on the edge of a bed, his shirt completely removed and a curtain drawn around them. The women turned his arms over, poking and prodding at the marks and asking if anything hurt as she did so. His answer was “No.” every time. Sometimes he suspected she thought he was lying had he not been sitting with no response at all to the touches. Some of the marks looked as if they should be ripping open his skin instead of sitting there with no reaction.

“That can’t be possible.” McGonagall said from the other side of the curtain. As Sirius’ head of house, Madam Pomfrey had sent for her when Slughorn had brought him in.

“Well, unfortunately, it’s entirely possible. These marks are probably from his soulmate.” Pomfrey straightened up, drawing the curtain open slightly to step outside it. She left it open, Sirius still sitting on the bed and looking up at the women.

“Soulmate marks don’t appear this early in children, do they? Never in all my years have I seen an eleven year old with marks.” the teacher asked.

Pomfrey nodded. “When soulmates are especially right for each other and share a close bond, their wounds and general marks may appear even at such a young age.”

The two were turning towards Sirius then, looking at him.

“Black, how long have these marks been showing up on you?” McGonagall asked, stepping only slightly closer.

Sirius shrugged. “Since I was maybe… five?”

“Five?!” Both women were surprised at his answer. Even Madam Pomfrey seemed taken aback. Sirius nodded.

Suddenly two pairs of footsteps echoed loudly as someone came rushing into the hospital wing.

“Madam Pomfrey, Professor McGonagall!”

That was Remus’ voice, Sirius was sure. Something deep in his gut jumped at the sound of his friend’s voice. He’d liked Remus right off the bat when they met on the train almost a year ago. Sirius had always wanted to be close to him, and Remus didn’t seem to mind, even at the beginning when the black haired boy was a little crude and mean towards others. He seemed to understand a bit.

“Mr. Lupin, Mr. Potter. What is the matter?” McGonagall asked steadily.

“Is Sirius here?”

“You can’t see him, Mr. Lupin.” Madam Pomfrey replied. When it came to her patients, she was all business, all the time. She said the rules were in place to keep students safe and that there wouldn’t be exceptions.

“But I’m alright, Madam Pomfrey. I’m not hurt.” Sirius said.

That seemed to give the woman pause. She looked as if she debated with herself for a moment before sighing and allowing Remus and James to go behind the curtain.

The second Remus saw Sirius, he halted in his tracks. James nearly fell into him at the sudden stop.

“Sirius…” the green eyed boy whispered, eyes roaming Sirius’ body.

“I’m not-” Sirius started, but hadn’t been able to finish. Remus was launching himself on Sirius, holding onto the older boy as if his life depended on it. He squeezed him, sitting beside Sirius on the bed and refusing to let go. “R-Remus!”

“I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!”

Every person in the room froze, noticing a wobbly quality to the curly haired boy’s voice. Despite himself, Sirius brought his arms up to wrap them around Remus too.

Without Remus and Sirius noticing, the two adults had shooed James from the room, closing the hospital wing doors and leaving the other first year out in the hallway.

“Boys…” Pomfrey said, drawing their attention. They both looked up at her, Remus’ eyes a little bit red and Sirius’ a little bit worried. “The two of you need to talk. When you’re done, come get me and Professor McGonagall from my office. We need to have a word with you.” With that, the two were walking to the other end of the room, and disappearing into the office, the door snapping shut behind them.

Slowly, Sirius looked back at his friend, wondering what could be going on. Today was just too strange.

Remus sighed, letting his arms drop from Sirius’ shoulders slowly. Without making eye contact, the younger boy pulled his jumper off and began unbuttoning his shirt, shedding it too. As skin appeared, Sirius made out scratch marks and bruises over his torso and arms. Glancing down at his own skin, Sirius noted that the black and blue sat in the same patterns and shapes on Remus’ own arms and body.

Suddenly something clicked.

“Remus… you’re…”

Then their eyes were meeting, red rimming the beautiful soft green of Remus’ irises.

“Do they hurt?” Remus asked quietly. Sirius shook his head.

“But yours do, right?” Sirius asked, reaching his hand up and tracing his fingers along purple and red on Remus’ forearms. Remus nodded.

“Where do they come from?”

“I can’t tell you that…”

“Why not?”

Remus just shook his head. “You used to draw to me.”

Sirius nodded. He remembered the times when he’d accidentally cut himself on the end of the quill and hurriedly run his arm under water in an attempt to keep the ink from infecting the cut. Most of the time, he’d been fine. A couple of times he hadn’t succeeded and had needed to tell his mother and father about it. They had not been happy with him.

“You drew too.”

“I wanted something else to look at…”

Then it was quiet. Neither said anything, though plenty of questions rushed through their minds.

Slowly, Sirius leaned forward, bringing his lips to Remus’ cheek where a pale scar sat on fair, freckled skin. He lingered there a moment before pulling away and looking at his friend again.

“Should we go see Madam Pomfrey?” he asked after a moment. Remus nodded.

The two dressed again, standing and walking over to the door. Sirius’ index finger found Remus’, hooking together as they walked. Behind the door, they could hear voices, though low and calm.

Sirius reached out and knocked lightly.

*

James and Peter couldn’t believe it when Sirius and Remus came back to the common room later. Mcgonagall and Pomfrey had sat the two down and explained things about soulmates and relationships to the eleven year olds. They’d explained why the markings show up on your soulmate and how it works, and that it usually only occurs in witches and wizards. Soulmates are a type of magic that two people perform unknowingly together, and though this appears mostly in the magically gifted, it will sometimes show up in muggles as well. But that is usually only when two people are meant to be together without even a shadow of a doubt.

Sirius nearly threw a fit when McGonagall said she would inform his parents of the new discovery. He told them that his mother and father could not, under any circumstances, find out about Remus. When questioned about it, Sirius had explained that if they found out, they’d hate him more. His soulmate was a boy! And beyond that, Remus was a halfblood. His parents wouldn’t stand for it and sirius would never see Remus again, let alone be friends with him.

McGonagall agreed, for the sake of quieting Sirius’ fears, to not tell Mr. and Mrs. Black about their son’s soulmate, though she wondered if they knew he had one to begin with. Sirius had said that the marks had shown up since he was five.

Remus, on the other hand, was perfectly fine with the prospect of his parents knowing his soulmate. Inwardly, he worried about their questions regarding his “condition” and how Sirius would be kept from that information.

Back in the common room, it was just the four of them. Most of the other students were taking advantage of the nice weather or studying somewhere besides the dark, often crowded common room. The conversation ranged from James wanting to know what it felt like to Peter expressing how he hoped he didn’t have a soulmate. At the age of eleven, plenty of boys did wish that, though often changed their minds as they grow older. Sirius figured this was the case for the older boy.

“Are you going to tell your parents?” James asked. He was the most excited for them, Peter finding himself happy, though a little unconcerned. Sirius and Remus seemed to just find it a little strange. Soulmates who found each other early in life were often marked as “betrothed”. They wouldn’t really date or marry until they were older, but adults seemed to think there had to be a term for their relationship, even as early as eleven years old.

Sure, Remus was happy. He’d kind of hoped that it was Sirius, having remembered the handwriting from years ago and seeing it on his friend’s homework. It hadn’t occurred to him that his own bruises and cuts would show up on Sirius though.

Sirius on the other hand was slightly frightened. Sure, it was nice that he knew his soulmate and that it was someone he was already close with and cared for a great deal, but that didn’t change the fact that no matter what, his parents could not know. Sirius didn’t give a damn if Remus was a boy or that his mother was a muggle, but Sirius’ parents cared a lot. Yeah, he couldn’t help that Remus was a boy, and that wasn’t the main problem Orion and Walburga would have, but the halfblood part was a “problem”. Good pureblood boys were to spend their lives with other respectable pureblood girls. They would get married and have good, pureblood children.

Of course, Sirius never had cared much for his parents’ pureblooded ideals.

The only people in his family he even remotely wanted to tell about Remus was his cousin Andromeda and his brother Regulus. When they were younger, Regulus would ask to see the marks on Sirius’ skin, especially when they were drawings. He loved that Sirius could communicate with his soulmate already. As they got older, Regulus played more and more like his didn’t care for the sake of their parents, but it never bothered Sirius. Now, he just wanted to share it with him again.

“No. Absolutely not.” Sirius said as Remus answered, “When I see them after school.”

James and Peter frowned, glancing between themselves. Sirius and Remus looked at each other too.

“Remus-”

“I know why you don’t want to tell them, and that’s fine. But I want to tell my mom and dad. They don’t have the same rules that your parents do.” Remus cut Sirius off smoothly. He leaves no room for argument, not that Sirius would have had one to begin with.

Sirius nodded, looking down at his lap. The bruising on his arms seemed darker in the shadowed light of the common room, on display with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He wondered again where the marks were coming from. Remus never had given an explanation for them. Sirius tucked that thought away for later, when James and Peter weren’t around, or at least asleep.

The four were quiet before Peter casually asked Remus to continue the study session so that he wouldn’t fail his potions final on Monday. The two went back to their spot on the floor, leaving Sirius and James by the little table they’d all crowded around.

“Sirius, come on. Let’s go outside.” James said. Sirius groaned inwardly. It was hot outside, and he was not looking forward to going back out in the heat. But, at least now he wouldn’t have to hide anything from his mate, so that made it a little better.

Strangely, James led Sirius upstairs to their dormitory first.

“James, what are we doing?”

When the door was closed behind them, James went and threw himself on his bed. He rolled, facing the ceiling now, his head at the foot of his bed. Sirius stood near the middle of the room, staring down at his friend.

“Sirius. Did Remus tell you how he got those bruises?” James asked.

“No. He didn’t.” Sirius said.

“But you’re wondering, right?”

Sirius nodded silently.

“Are you going to ask?”

“Yes, but if he doesn’t want anyone else to know, I won’t tell you.” Sirius said defensively.

James sat up and looked at Sirius. “I know that. I would never ask you to do that. But if he’s in trouble, you’ll help him won’t you?”

Sirius stared James in his hazel eyes for a moment. He wanted to be mad. He wanted to make sure James never doubted his intentions again. He wanted to yell that James had no right to tell Sirius what he should do. But he also knew James.

Sirius knew James was a carer. He cared a lot for those he loved, and he loved Remus. He also loved Sirius, and if the situations were reversed, James would be asking Remus these questions. And Sirius also knew that James was a worrier. If his friends were upset or sad or angry or what have you, James worried. He worried that his mates would get hurt or that his friends would fail a class. He worried about these tiny little things that, to some people, wouldn’t make a difference in their everyday lives, but were big things to James.

For that, and only that, did Sirius not roll his eyes or raise his voice or push James away.

“Of course I’ll help him, James. You know that.” he said, joining James on his bed.

“I do…” the younger said, glancing down at his hands.

“I got him, Jamie.” Sirius whispered. James nodded.

*

That evening, the four went to dinner and ate, laughing and joking as they had for the past nine months. A couple of people stared pointedly at Sirius’ arms, though none of their teachers seemed to think anything was out of the ordinary.

James and Peter turned in early for the night later, leaving Sirius and Remus down in the common room. Remus was curled up on a couch near the fireplace, a book settled on the arm, knees tucked up by his chest. Sirius lay on the floor in front of his soulmate, watching the firelight dance across the walls and ceiling. He thought bitterly that he could be on the couch too, had there not been a small group of fourth years sitting on the other end.

Around half past ten, the fourth years dispersed, and Sirius hopped up to take a seat on the couch. He sat next to Remus, sure to leave enough space between them. They may be soulmates, but Remus still liked his space, just like he had for the past school year. That didn’t change just because they found out something that had been there all along.

After minutes of staring into the flames, Sirius felt Remus shift next to him. He thought vaguely that the younger boy might be getting up to go to bed, but then Remus was leaning into Sirius’ side. The older boy felt caramel curls press into his neck as Remus rested his head on Sirius’ shoulder. The book was relocated to Remus’ lap, and after a moment of getting comfortable, he sat still again, the quiet continuing.

Sirius smiled a little. This time last year, he wouldn’t have wanted anyone to sit with him like this, except maybe Regulus on a bad day. But thanks to James, Sirius’ own sense of touch and people was higher, and beginning to uncover a need for physical affection. Remus may not be one for much physical interaction either, so that made it a little bit better.

Around eleven, Sirius realized they were alone in the common room. ‘Better now than never…’ he thought to himself.

“Re?” he said into the silence.

Remus grunted in acknowledgement. Sirius realized the younger’s eyes were hardly staying open now.

“Why are you hurt?”

Remus didn’t respond.

“Remus, really. Why are you hurt?”

“I can’t tell you.” Remus said quietly.

“Why not?”

“I just can’t. I’m sorry.”

Sirius sat quietly for a moment. He didn’t want to push Remus more than he had today, but this was important.

“Is someone hurting you?” he questioned gently. Remus shook his head. “You’re not doing it, right?” Another shake of the head.

“Then what?”

“Can’t tell…”

Sirius groaned a little.

Fine. If Remus wouldn’t tell him what was going on, Sirius would just have to figure it out for himself.

“You know I’m not going to give up until I find out.” he warned his mate.

“I know…” Remus sighed.

A few more minutes of silence passed where the only sound was that of the crackling and popping of the fire. Before long, Remus got up and went to bed, one hand in Sirius’, their fingers intertwined.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! If you found any mistakes, let me know, so that I may fix them. Also, if you liked this and maybe want to see more from my soulmate wolfstar au. I do have another fic waiting to be finished and posted. Thanks again, and see ya later chickadees! :D


End file.
